Tuesday, December 29, 2009

Home.

I really miss my husband.

He's in Utah.
Fly fishing, welding and snowboarding.
and the house is so quiet without him.

Cue Mom.
A mother and daughter have a way of needing each other at the same time.
At least we seem to.
I had such a great time preparing for her visit.
Typically my time management skills are terrible.
Really, truly terrible.
What happens is usually Casey will give me some sort of heads up.
i.e. babe, we have to be there in a half hour and it takes 15 minutes to get there...
Sounds good. I say with a smile, going about my business.
the same business I was attending to before he made that comment.
So basically, not taking the cue that I should be changing my business
to the "getting ready" type of business.
Then five minutes until departure and I'm all,
Babe! Why didn't you tell me what time it was?!
And I'm rushing. And where the freak are my skinny jeans?!
And Stop following me around, youre making me nervous!
(Casey does this "following" thing when I'm late. drives me nuts)
And I'm a crazy lady.
And were 20 minutes late.
2 miles into our journey and I ask, Did you put diapers in the diaper bag?

And Casey's all, Why would I assume that the diaper bag doesn't already contain
diapers?!?
Casey is from Mars and I am from Venus.

But I digress.
Today I switched things up and started preparing dinner early.
And you know what?
I really enjoyed myself and it was even... dare I say... relaxing?
Yes. Relaxing.
I had music on and I'm not talking about the Wiggles.
Like Real Grown Up music.
I had candles burning.
There was even some dancing in the kitchen, donning an apron with Ginger moments.
I know. Crazy.
And this happiness continued all through the night
while mom and I ate roast and watched Paper Moon.
Which by the way, all I could think of during that movie was...
Tatum, one day you are going to get busted for trying to buy drugs from
an undercover cop.
Then you'll go on Oprah to apologize to your kids for it.

Moral of this post is...
Someone once told me

(granted, in a moment of anger)
that I'm incapable of just. being. happy.

I thought, I can be freaking happy, you moron.
I'll show you.

That all led me to making an effort
to look for and acknowledge the beautiful and happy moments more often.
And it just seems like those moments reveal themselves to me
more everyday.
Because I'm seeking after them, not waiting for them to slap me in the face.
It's fantastic.
Honestly.
As fake as this all sounds.
I know it seems that way.
I'd roll my eyes too.
But. I'm grateful. So there you go.

And to any of you that say I'm not capable of contentment...
Suck it.

kidding.
I totally just ruined this post for some people.

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AND Ginger learned a new trick.
Drumroll please...

Ta-Dah! She can take off her diaper.

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Now I've been known to stage a photo or 2.
(Oh you know you've done it)
But I swear to you, I caught this picture candidly.
No remotes, no x-box controllers, no candy wrappers.

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Still, I'd welcome the mess
if it meant Casey was home.

Anyone ready to throw up yet?
No?

Dearest Casey,
the start of the letter 2009 steve powers

How about now?

And so I say,
Go forth,
Acknowledge the happy moments.
Look for the beauty in life.
Buy flowers.
Tell Tatum O'Neal her future through the t.v.
Enjoy the occasional Baby Butt.
And tell the naysayers to suck it.

7 comments:

Jessica said...

*ALEXXXISSSSssss*! The all-capital letters, the stars around your name.. are in reference to "the queen".

dude... I LOVE this post. I laughed. out. LOUD. as I read. I'm at work and 2 of the 5 people in my cubilcle row turned to stare for 1 second. -unheard of.

I am happy to hear of your happiness. I haven't been really following many blogs lately, although luckily yours wasn't one of them.

andrea. said...

you sould like you are doing great!! i love your post...and all the pictures. your house looks beautiful, it has really come together since the last time i saw pictures.

i am also a firm believer that fresh flowers make everything better...always keep them around!

ps. that picture of ginger cracked me up...she is going to love that one when she is older!

Lindzie said...

Love you house! I think getting organized at least one time is awesome. Also, you don't know how many times we've wanted to go out the door, we're sitting in the carm and I've asked Kyle, "Did you get the diaper bag? Does it have a diaper, bottle, formula?" His reply, "No I thought you got it." To which I sigh and get out of the car to go and search for all the needed items. I guess he just assumes I always have it under control when in reality I'm good just to remember the baby with the carseat. So I know how you feel. :) We love them just the same.

Glad to hear you've found your happy place...it's taken me 6 months to find mine! :) Hope Casey comes home soon.

kurt and ash said...

I am sad that I have been such a slacker and that I have missed all the great posts you have done lately! Seriosuly, love them all!

You make me happy just reading these and make me want to drive my booty to Vegas a give you the biggest hug EVER!!!

Kate Korr said...

Holy buns! Sweet, I can't wait until Michael starts taking his diaper off and peeing everywhere, almost like marking his territory around the house. Ginger's antics give me the heads up of what's to come in our household in the following weeks. :)

I have just recently started to take a few moments here and there to stop and play, realizing that I even though I may have a freaking lot of work right now, in a few years, she won't be begging me to play with her. I will be getting doors slammed in my face. Yeah! So much to look forward too! :)

Luke, Nicole, and Brighten said...

I have no idea how to get a hold of you! I have the email that you never check...the wrong cell phone number....an out of date address....you haven't become my friend now that i joined face book...should I send you a smoke signal? I love you so much and want to talk to you. CALL ME!!!!!!!, oh yeah did I mention just how much I miss you!!!!!!!!!!!

Rebecca said...

You are such a cute blogger!