Lets talk pregnancy

Oh so much to tell.

Keeping the pregnancy secret is torture.

It was especially hard for Casey

who via twitter, a month or so, tweeted

Wait, are you ready for this?

He said...

I love how Ali calls them "pregnancy farts"

Okay that is wrong on so many levels.

Moving on...

Here's more information than you probably care for...

Wow, that actual a perfect name for my blog.

More Information Than You Care For.

kinda catchy.

Im going to pretend Im a celebrity and this is an

interview for US magazine.

So how do you feel Alexis?

We are just over the moon.

(That's what all the celebs say; Gwen S., Gwen P., Jlo, Jen Gardner

all my besties)

Just totally over the moon.

Were you guys trying?

Yes. No. Yes. Passively.

Here's the thing... I'm not the type of person

who can sit down and say. Let's try to have a baby.

Its too much pressure on myself.

My anxiety would shoot through the roof.

So basically,

Um. Hmmm. How do I put this

so our moms dont throw up?

We stopped birth control.

Our method of birth control is the good ol "pull out" method.

Seriously.

Sorry Moms, just keepin it real.

There was no conversation about it...

We knew we wanted our kids about 2 years apart

so that was that.

Then one night...

And this is oh so tender;

One night after we were um done

I layed on my back and put my legs in the air and

said

Swim Sperm... Swim for your life!

And Casey and I died laughing

because were that mature,

but I really think that's when we conceived.

Isnt that beautiful?

My child will treasure that story all the days of his/her life.

Anyway, I make it seem like it was easy peasy...

But really it took a few months

(I promise, Im not complaining, my heart breaks for those who struggle

with infertility.)

So before I got a plus sign

I took a few tests in the prior months...

Negative results.

I was starting to get worried.

Then one week I took a test because it was time,

it was negative again and my heart broke in a million pieces.

But I didn't talk about it.

I just didnt want to say aloud how bad I wanted baby 2.

A couple weeks pass

and Casey says to me,

You know youre pregnant right?

I dont know why he said that.

Perhaps a burning in his bosom?

Or maybe his horoscope that day said,

Today will bring you some crystallized notions that

will interfere with the flexibility of your thinking

as well as a growing fetus in your wife's belly.

One can never be sure.

I dismissed his comment

until the next day when I was cleaning and came

across my trusty pack of pregnancy tests.

Although I was certain I wasnt pregnant

It couldnt hurt to pee on another stick, right?

So I did... and while I did, my mom called.

We shot the crap for a while...

I finished peeing and continued cleaning

totally forgetting about the pregnancy test.

Then I went to bring some towels in the bathroom

and noticed the test just sitting there.

Meanwhile my mom is talking about something

super random like Bingo...

when I saw the plus sign.

And. I. Screamed.

and screamed and screamed and screamed.

I blurted out, "Im pregnant!! Im pregnant!!"

And then my mom screamed. and screamed.

And Ginger freaked out because

Why the heck is her mom going ape crap right now?

And then I just started giggling, as did my mom.

And Ginger continued to stare at this ridiculous scene

unfolding before her eyes.

It was one of the most joyous moments of my life.

Wait, youre not going to put all that in the magazine right?

Ok cool.

Like leave out the "Swim Sperm Swim" line.

Thanks.

So we know you are Over the Moon about this baby...

Totally.

But how are you feeling otherwise?

Ohhhhh, right, like do I feel pregnant?

Yes. Oy yes I feel oh so pregnant.

The first six weeks of my pregnancy I felt amazing.

I actually said to Casey, "Oh my gosh, being pregnant is so wonderful,

Im going to be one of those preggos who are like, I love being pregnant!"

and people will roll their eyes at me and Ill love every second.

I said that.

And then a week later, someone turned on the pregnancy switch.

Ughhhh!

Were talking nausea complete with puking

and I was tired beyond tired.

I had all the same symptoms I did with Ginger only more intense.

My Dr. prescribed me anti nausea medicine

which saved me!

Saved me while killing my husband.

Because a side effect is constipation...

which leads to gas.

hahahaha. payback.

Im starting to feel better now.

Not really taking the med anymore... youre welcome Casey.

I have really intense cravings.

SALTY. anything SALTY.

One night I was craving Vietnamese food.

Vermicelli with char broiled pork saturated in fish sauce.

I asked Casey to go get me some.

He said, Maybe we shouldnt since weve eaten out so much this week.

Now Im going to tell you something... only a pregnant woman would understand...

Although he was right, I actually cried!

I cried! Tears... because I couldnt have pork with fish sauce.

If thats not the most ridiculous thing.

I know I could have gone out and got the Vietnamese food myself...

Casey wouldn't have beat me too bad.

But by that time I was so embarrassed for myself

I made a personal promise I would find something else to eat and be

content with that choice.

But truth be told, I thought about that fishy pork until the

very last minute of the night, while in bed

on my way to the land of nod.

Oh to be pregnant.

To sum things up though...

Im so so so excited and grateful to be pregnant.

I mean look at Ginger

were doing a stellar job...

Were doing the world a favor.

Youre welcome world.